420 ftw
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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