He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
