Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
How external is "for external use only"?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
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