4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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