It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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