Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize