3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize