Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
