After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
