i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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