we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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