Do vagina's smell?
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize