so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Randomize
