What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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