this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
