when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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