i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
