Non-Jews are for practice
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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