Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
