So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
