Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
