Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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