matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
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