): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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