When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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