It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
