My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
