I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I love having hate sex.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
