I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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