I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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