God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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