I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
