We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
