consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
