I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
you made out with another girl for some wings
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize