u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
