Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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