The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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