Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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