she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
