Porn is love you can see.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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