none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I showed him my bush... on skype.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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