i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
