Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
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