i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
