Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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