why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Randomize
