Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Too much gin, very little bucket
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
