I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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