His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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